Sick :/

I have not been feeling well. Today i stayed home and woke up at around 3 and had breakfast. Hehehe.

for him

you didn't mess up my life. you brought a little more knowledge into it, more thoughts stumbling through a dusted window of always wonder. you gave me that secret smile when i was down if i thought about things you said. of course, though, there was pain. there is always pain & the pain you brought was bittersweet. you filled my thoughts when they lead no where. made me hope & believe once more. you drove my heart in overdrive of a broken stutter. moments with you are best. so, no, you didn't mess my life up completely. you just made a beautiful mess which i don't regret even through the tears shed. it was temporary madness that cooled down. after all, everything happens for a reason and i still want you part of me.

Two for sorrow, none for joy

I was just waiting for your answer
You made your own apologies
I cried so much I had to leave

It is 12.18 and i can not sleep. Today was rather non-eventful. I went to KL to see my grandma and then pavilion, where i bumped into Zinees' family minus him and just went window shopping. Btw, i'm secretly using the computer cause if my mom would know i'm on it right, now, so late, she'd kill me.

discarded thoughts flutter under my bruised ego where i hide all possible & the light isn't bright enough to block out the voices that barely re-call with open arms of whispered goobyes.

i am confused by you and words you said that have me thinking back to scattered battlegrounds where salt visited internally everyday & i don't know what to think of our hushed whisper of take me seriously, so afarid of getting hurt.

dust gathers like splatters of rain as i turn towards your bloody heart in vain of something too late to tell if coincidence is just bad luck with no regrets tinting my wind shield of reflect.

Leaving is the hardest thing to do

I'm bored, so i'm uploading most of the pictures from my My Pictures Folder (: OMG. I have no pictures of Azzy except for Two -pouts
Night x

Naddie Azli

Naddie and I after Drama Practice. Apparently, i talk too fast so my voice has to be dubbed by Fareena. Oh, well. And i suck at miming. It's like the one thing i fail at in Drama. Shit, anyway, tomorrow i'll be going to the eye clinic cause there's this corn like thingy innit. Yeeaaahhhh.. Man. Today is so sucky. Ciao x

False hope spoon feed

day 1 : you flirt all you can
day 2 : you smile secretly with memories of said
day 3 : you start to wonder
day 4 : you break down

Aww come on

It was a blackout. We were sitting in the TV room watching the tellie with the lamp on. I realized it as i saw the light go off, followed by the television and then the rest. I was scared and climbed on to my Daddies' shoulder because he had to go down to the cellar to on the power plug and i didn't want to be left alone. As we were about to go down, the house door opened and it was my mom.

It's class hours but Arissa and i are in the toilet, in one stall. I'm sitting and she's standing, trying to help me pull my teeth out. Hahahah...

I don't know why i'm writing this all, here. I guess you need to be in my mind to truly understand and see all the random splatters of forgotten memories with random scenerys.

You thought you found faith

I re-call that in Germany after something happened -i.e shouting- i would always lie in bed and think of an empty tennis court with one lone ball and all these voices bouncing around my head and just repeating those words or other bad ones said by other people all over, and i couldn't keep it at bay.

So, i'm not feeling well. Yesterday i slept through most of Chemistry and today whole of English. Oh, sigh...

Memories worth so much

Reflected thoughts coming to surface.

I miss Raja Aishah Rashid, that sweet angel doll with her unique beauty (:

So, these are just a glimpse to treasured memories of 2009, though a glimpse because they don't show anything and what i remember is far more precious. Those moments, especially at Camp even though it was kind of lame since i kept on getting in trouble but still (: